Being separated or divorced from your spouse and sharing children brings a new issue in your life. Holidays are incredibly delicate times when your kids might feel the impact of your separation a little more than usual and when the stress level arises for both you and your ex.
Co-parenting is not easy, but with the right tools and, most of all, the intention of making your kids’ lives as best as possible, you and your ex can implement successful strategies when dealing with school problems, family holidays, or vacations.
Here are four strategies for successful co-parenting during Thanksgiving.
If you were kind of making it along the way before the divorce, not planning anything, things need to change. When co-parenting, it’s crucial that you know what’s about to happen and how to split the tasks and responsibilities between both of you.
Take a moment to talk to your ex about Thanksgiving and make a plan together that would fit you both. If you can’t find a consensus, compromise if necessary. A mediator is also equipped to handle such delicate situations and help you get to a final decision.
This should be your everyday mantra in life, from the moment you divorce your spouse. Children’s interests should always prime, no matter how awkward things will get for you or how inconvenient it is to follow a specific plan.
If your relationship with your ex is not the greatest, work on dealing with your negative feelings. Don’t let them affect your children’s holidays and relationship with the other parent.
If your kids are with you and your family during Thanksgiving, take a few preventive measures to protect them from unwanted comments and discussions during your dinner or vacation.
We all know how family congregations always have an awkward element, whether it’s nosy questions from a distant relative or a tipsy uncle who blabbers about politics. Make sure your kids don’t hear about your divorce in these circumstances, and talk to the participants to let them know about this rule.
If logistics or other factors make co-parenting very difficult during Thanksgiving, consider a simple yet effective way of keeping the children happy: both of you will spend time with them during the holidays.
It’s up to you and your ex to discuss how you will share the meal. You can suggest breakfast at one of you, then dinner at the other. The children will enjoy spending the holidays with both of you.
No matter your current situation following a divorce, remember that the holidays are about children and that Thanksgiving can be a perfect moment to be grateful for what you have and make the best of it.
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